From the editor’s desk: Leaving the nest

Sarah Nigbor

By Sarah Nigbor

Friday was a bit surreal. My oldest son graduated from high school, a day many parents both anticipate with excitement because their child made it through 13+ years of school and dread because it’s the end of an era.

As he marched across the stage to receive his diploma, it wasn’t my life that flashed before my eyes but moments from his. Singing at the Pierce County Fair talent show. Sledding down the hill by St. John’s Lutheran Church. Attending plays at the Stagehands Theatre. Building Boy Scout derby cars with him. Having a heart attack when he fell out of a tree. Watching him beam with pride when he harvested his first deer. Talking him out of thinking his first vehicle was going to be a Ferrari (dream on).

I met Ethan when he was 8 years old. I’ve been his stepmother now for close to eight years and it has been one of the highlights of my life. He is one of the kindest, most even-keeled, level-headed kids I know. His singing voice, acting ability and piano playing skills are out of this world. I am so excited to see where life takes him next.

Ethan has decided to attend college at the University of North Dakota in Grand Forks to pursue a double major in music education and business. While I wish it wasn’t so far away, I’m excited for him. It’s weird to think of him being out on his own, away from home, beginning his own life. While I’m happy and sad, my husband is utterly devastated. Ethan is his first-born and they’re very close. They hunt and fish together, watch sports on TV (is the NBA season ever going to end??), scratch lottery tickets, do yard work. He’s having a very hard time accepting the fact that Ethan is going to leave the nest. Our other kids will soon follow, because they’re like stair steps, one after the other. Shane is not taking this transition well.

Don’t get me wrong, I love our children with my entire heart and would do anything for them. But I’m excited for the next phase in life. There are many, many things I will miss and cherish. And I know motherhood doesn’t end just because they turn 18, nor would I want it to. But I must say, it will be nice not having to wake children up for school someday and wrestle them out of their beds. Teens are not nice people in the morning; they’re like different creatures who lack the ability to speak and just grunt. It will be nice to go on a vacation in the summer that doesn’t involve youth sports tournaments. I dream about the day I don’t have to nag kids to pick up their dirty clothes, dishes, wrappers, etc. What will it be like to return home to find a clean house and a full fridge? Bliss, I tell you. All kidding aside, I will miss them dearly when they all go off on their own. But isn’t that the point? To raise respectable, contributing members of society who create lives of their own?

As we figure out how to navigate this next chapter, I’m urging my husband to enjoy all the moments he can but not to clutch his little bird too tightly when he needs to fly. Our little birdie is welcome to come home any time he wants, even with loads of dirty laundry. I just pray he learns to put it in a hamper.